Tuesday, April 27, 2010
WE MADE IT! 4.25.09 - 4.25.10
Ben and I have officially been married for over one year. At this time last year, Ben and I were on our honeymoon in Napa Valley starting life together in a very naive way. Yes, everyone told us that the first year is the hardest, but no one really explained just how hard it really is. No one went into the deeper details of why it is the hardest year. No one explained their reasoning behind the "if you can just make it through the first year, everything will be fine."
Well, we made it. Yes, I say that like it is a big accomplishment, because, well, there were times when I wasn't sure we would make it. This past year has been the hardest year of my life. I say that knowing full well that Ben would say the exact same thing. I see now why the Lord brought man and woman together - to break us and mold us into the people He called us to be. Little did I know that my spouse would be the liaison/vessel of the Lord.
This has been such a journey. We have had lots of ups and lots of downs. At times we both wanted to just call it quits, but we didn't, and for that I am most proud. We recognized the importance of the vows that we made. I think Ben and I walked into marriage not really knowing what its purpose was. I can honestly say that the Lord has used Ben to break me and make me into a better person. The Lord placed Ben in my life to show me my weaknesses and areas of humanness that were not pleasing to Him. It is a continual process of dying to myself and letting the Lord break me...and for that, I am honored to have Ben serve as His tool and also to serve as my partner who loves me and cares for me when I am struggling to be broken.
Seeing as how this is our first anniversary, we kept with traditional and did the whole giving a 'paper' gift. I got Ben (us) a Family Marriage Bible engraved with "Swiharts" on the cover. A friend of ours had given us a bible holder (technically it was for a Koran) from Somaliland and we needed a Bible to place on it. Plus, I wanted our family to have a Bible. Ben gave me a wonderfully written love letter. I cherish those things so it was just the perfect gift. Yup, I cried when I read it....He also broke a little from tradition and is getting me a ring for my right hand, ring finger. The significance in this is that Ben was unable to engrave my wedding band because it was too small. So now, I get a new ring that will be engraved! I am excited and can't wait to show it off!